Golden Rule #1 of Dating

Don’t Leave Anyone Worse Off Than They Were before You Met Them

Romans 11:29(NLT) tells us, “For God’s gifts and his call can never be withdrawn.” This tells us all we need to know about Heavenly Father’s generosity. When He gives us a blessing, we can be sure that He’s not going to take it back, but the truth of this reality begs us to use spiritual maturity and the wisdom that comes with it. Everything that you and I call a blessing isn’t necessarily from God. As a matter of fact, one of the dastardly tricks of the devil is to disguise the most insidious evil and make it look like a blessing. Many of us have fallen for this trick. We meet someone who seems to check off all the right boxes, but those red flags are gradually revealed. Even though we know something isn’t right, we continue the relationship and things fall apart. The sting of the aftermath can be devastating. This isn’t the blessing that Romans 11:29 is talking about.

We will sometimes mourn far too long for the loss of a relationship that went wrong. This wasn’t the right person for the destiny God has assigned to us. Rather than continuing the patterns and behaviors that landed us in a hurtful situation, we can have a change of heart, a change of mind, and a change of attitude. We can be committed to learn the spiritual lessons we were placed on this earth to learn, and most importantly, we can increase our faith in God through Jesus Christ. Hebrews 11:6 tells us that we cannot please God without faith. This verse also tells us that God is a Rewarder to those that diligently seek Him. When we turn up the volume on our seeking God, He takes notice, and He will reward our commitment to put Him first. Adhering to Golden Rule Number One will help to make sure that our motivation and commitment to let Christ take the lead is where it needs to be.

The psalmist, King David, said in Psalm 139:4(NLT), “You know what I am going to say even before I say it, LORD.” Heavenly Father is all-powerful, all-knowing, and everywhere present. There isn’t anything He doesn’t know. He knows our past, present, and future. Revelation 1:8 tells us that He’s Alpha and Omega, the Beginning and the End. He knows the beginning at the end, and He knows the end at the beginning. Nothing escapes Him. All of us have a well of gratitude in our inner being. This well of gratitude is the capacity that you and I have cultivated to demonstrate gratitude to Heavenly Father for His blessings. A well of gratitude isn’t something we can fake, and God knows exactly how thankful we are at any given time.

Many of us haven’t expanded our capacity when it comes to demonstrating gratitude to Heavenly Father for His blessings. This is one of the reasons why we haven’t received the treasure we desire. It doesn’t matter who you are or what you do, none of us receive blessings of which we lack the capacity to be authentically and earnestly thankful to receive. Without an ample well of gratitude, it may look like a blessing, but it’s really a trick in disguise.

Leaving a person in better condition than they were when you first met them isn’t always possible, but in most cases it is. If the condition of our hearts is such that we have no qualms about leaving a poor demonstration of the love of Christ, we are not spiritually prepared for the blessing of a lasting relationship. As ambassadors of Christ, people should be better off from having been connected to us in some way. If they aren’t, we certainly cannot afford to be the cause of it. The eyes of heaven and everything beneath it are on our every move. If we are the cause of a person being worse off than they were before we met them, we will be judged, because God has equipped us in Christ in such a way that we can always be poised to leave a lasting mark of His love. 

One of the Books of the Old Testament is the Book of Job. This book is the record of a man called Job. It chronicles the incredible troubles and hardships he endured because of the evil that satan caused him. Job 1:7(NLT) tells us a little bit about satan’s plot. It starts with God asking the devil a question, “Where have you come from?” the LORD asked Satan. Satan answered the LORD, “I have been patrolling the earth, watching everything that’s going on.” God also warns us in 1Peter 5:8(NLT), “Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.” There can be no doubt in our minds that the devil and his demonic cohorts comb the earth looking for openings where they can get in and cause damage. If we are the kind of people who offer little to no resistance to their plots and tricks, they know it, and will destroy our relationships and anything else we have left exposed.

The Lord Jesus Christ offers us protection, not just for ourselves, but for all that we love and establish for good. Our decision to remain under the covering of Christ is the standing and diligence that God rewards. This is one of the reasons that it is so important for us to be guided by God through the Lord Jesus Christ when it comes to our relationships. God commands us in Colossians 2:7(NLT), “Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.” A significant or romantic relationship can only be a blessing and last when it is rooted and grounded in Christ. If it isn’t, it can and will most likely be weaponized by satan against us.

Know that should you desire it, a beautiful, loving, and secure relationship with a special person is what God wants you to have. Your well of gratitude for this blessing must swell to the point where you are consciously making room for it. Jesus Christ teaches us in Matthew 6:19-21(NLT), “Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal.Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.” You should be dedicated to laying up the kind of treasures that can be kept in heaven, the kind that cannot be destroyed by the enemy.

If your treasure is pleasing God, living according to His Word, and properly stewarding His blessings, your heart is in the right place. Therefore, your treasures will be in the right place as well. They will be kept and covered by the Lord. Within our hearts, we must be committed to do no harm. 2Corinithans 5:20 says that we are ambassadors for Christ. We represent him, and when representing Christ to the very best of our ability is our goal, we will be diligent to leave an impression of his goodness. We will humbly apologize for any wrong we may have done, and we will be thankful for the spiritual lessons that have prepared us to receive the blessing we desire most. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Golden Rule #1 of Dating: Don’t Leave Anyone Worse Off Than They Were before You Met Them” written for Crazynlove.com ©2021  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!